Quote:
Originally Posted by mcl6136
I can understanding the longing but I wonder if the stress of that relationship is something that you don't miss? You are going into uncharted territory with a new T but maybe the relationship will be more easygoing and less nerve jangling and difficult. Maybe it will be a chance to focus on YOU.
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Yes. This. This is the only thing that is really getting me through. However, I just really want to beleive she also still cares, even if that is making it about her again. Part of me is scared that I destroyed whatever caring she felt for me as soon as I crossed her boundary. Therapy is so confusing. I don’t understand how I could feel so cared for by someone, so connected, but it’s all just contained in those four walls. I didn’t really know how fragile that containment and black and white it was until I broke her boundary. I don’t mean that to minimize what I’ve done. It’s just hard for me to process.