Quote:
Originally Posted by Arbie
It doesn't matter if the recipient of constant jokes actually has that trait or not. A person with normal breath gets digs about having bad breath. A person of healthy weight gets digs about being fat. A person of normal intelligence gets digs about being an airhead. And a person who is straight gets digs about being gay.
The reason for the jokes is to throw the target off his/her game. Sooner or later, they're going to question themselves. "What is it about me that is sending off those signals? Why do they think that about me?" They DON'T actually think that. They're using it as a weapon to undermine confidence.
The most infuriating thing about this subtle undercutting is that you can't prove it. They stay *just* under the radar, so it's deniable. If you say anything, or even ask them what they meant, they can claim it's all in your imagination.
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Well put, thank you. There is no name for this kind of behaviour / attitude, is there?
I wonder what to do about it. Avoid such individuals when possible? I have never managed to make myself indifferent to this kind of behaviour. It feels as a mild illness or disfunction, not dangerous but contagious.
Some of these do require planning - and you would not believe in three gaffes in a row.
The worst thing is the anticipation while hearing nonsense that is sure to turn out in a moment to have been meant to wrap up some vile comments because no one would otherwise bother uttering such cr...
Yes, it is not the remarks themselves but being subjected to bad-intentioned class B monologues.
Sorry for being negative.