Didn't read the book but had my own experience of doing this over the last 11 years. I spent the last 11 years getting it touch with who I really am after 21 years in a dysfunctional family growing up & another 33 years in a dysfunctional marriage. I needed to find out who I was when I was finally no longer all those dysfunctional people. I needed to find out what part (if any) I played in the dysfunction & make the needed corrections. I can see where the self I found was inside me all those years questioning & wanting to get out....something that couldn't seem to happen until I was finally free from the oppressive dysfunction that so negatively effected me & that the self inside did literally & constantly fight against.