I'm sorry you're struggling with this. Yes, non-death-related grief is certainly a part of what I struggle with. I'm sorry you feel you can't talk about it. But I understand. There are things I can't ever talk about in-person or anonymously over the internet. In my case, what I do is to simply sit with my own grief as well as other difficult emotions. There's an article, in PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of sitting with painful emotions. Here's a link:

How to Sit with Painful Emotions