I seriously have to buy groceries this weekend, and i truly don't know what to get/if i can face it.
*I'll pay you a million dollars to figure out food and go get it.
** I'm gonna need you to bill me. Later. Much later.

I don't know why I eat too much or too often when I do. I used to think I was comforting myself for different reasons but I think I was really just feeling sorry for myself and thinking I'm going to be heavy and there's no way out of this. I had to change my attitude to thinking It is possible for me to lose weight and eat healthy and feel better. I'm trying to not use excuses to enable myself to eat a whole lot and too often. It's challenging that's for sure but I really want to be healthier and happier (with myself) and eating what is best for me will help me to get to my goal. I am still taking small steps but I have changed all of what I eat now. I had to because of diabetes and cirrhosis. I want to be alive to care for my fids and furbaby. They deserve me to be all there for them.

Yes, I backslide at times, it's part of the process. I am learning how to get back up and fight for my health. I'm trying not to feel bad about anything I eat anymore and eating right is the best way for me to do it. I am on a relatively low carb and eating from all food groups in the correct portions. I had to learn what are the right portions because I was so off the chart with that. This is kind of a tough day for me.