Our feelings are valid.....sometimes our thinking that creates those feelings is what is flawed....sometimes it is the oeople around us creating an environment that causes us to feel that way.

That is why it is good to go over the causes of our feelings in therapy & analyze our thinking that is bringing us to feel the things we feel.

At first in therapy I had no idea of any feeling other than the anger that had built up in my 33 years of marriage. My T gave me a list of feeling words. I made a 2 page list whrn went back & defined what was causing those feelings. Most if my thinking was valid but there were some things where my thinking about the situation incorrevtly caused me to have feelings I would not have had if I had thought through the situation accurately.

Sometimes when someone tells us our feelings are "dumb" what they are really trying to say is that maybe our thoughts about what is causing our feelings may not be accurate (assuming that person isn't just a judgmental jerk)