the piece i am remembering... i was 12 i think. you know, i think i've posted this before. i don't want to repeat myself. and yet this is surfacing right now. ok; here's the skinny.
-my friend and i were drugged by the guy's 8 yr old girl we were friends with (who was always drugged and abused - i found out later)
-thought it was candy (pixi dust) so took it
-she led us to his upstairs apt.
-he laid her on floor and he **** and had me and my friend watch; me standing at her feet, my friend standing at her head where he told us to stand and physically made us go there to those spots
-then he had my friend lay on the floor and he ***** while i watched - i don't know what his daughter and son were doing during that time, i can't see them in my memories
-then had me lay on the floor and he *****.

so i've been getting really shakey tonight and feeling like i might self injure to stop the fear and memories. i'm hoping posting will take the poison out of me for the night.