"Should I just dump him and move on to someone who is open and understanding, or is there some way to change his behaviour to deal with the problems instead of forcibly turning a blind eye?"

It sounds like you'd be much happier finding someone who at least listens and tries to understand. Sounds like this man isn't worth the effort. He might change, then again, it might take several years. Are you willing to wait when you could find happiness elsewhere? You shouldn't be the one to change him, he has to make that choise himself. Hopefully, threw intraspection and talking on this forum, you maybe gain a better understand for why you attract these kind of guys.

Hope everything goes well, Jess