Quote:
Originally Posted by LabRat27
I think it might be more helpful to say something along the lines of "It's not something that I would personally find helpful to do with my therapist."
I try to speak from my own experience or bring up concerns that occur to me, or even make suggestions, but not tell other people what they should or shouldn't do (except in extreme circumstances when it's something really obviously dangerous).
I think there's enough self-shaming and self-judgement among members here (at least speaking for myself) that a comment calling something that other people find beneficial and constructive "****" is probably going to be hurtful, possibly to OP, and also possibly to the many members reading this who have done exactly this same thing with our Ts.
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I definitely found it hurtful. The very fact that i'm asking this question on this forum implies that I already feel like I'm weird and I'm judging myself harshly. Everything Jessica11 said was fine until she called it '****'. There's no need for terms like that and name calling in a supportive forum... And it's your prerogative to not read long posts on this forum but then don't reply if you don't have all the information you know?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne2.0
I don't have a problem with anyone saying what they think about something and I didn't find your rather blunt way of saying so "unsupportive." If someone thinks your post is wrong, they can report you to a moderator. If the OP doesn't want to hear what you have to say, s/he can put you on ignore and so can anybody else, or anyone can just skip by any post that isn't helpful to them.
I think it's insulting and arrogant for any poster to tell anyone else how to be "supportive" to someone else and dictate the words that have to be used for that. It's your choice whether you want to follow the demands of other people who claim to be better than everyone else and know better what works for everyone else. I appreciate diversity in perspectives and in expression.
I also think, and you'll find other posts where this is true, that when questions are asked, like have you ever had this experience, it's a fine answer to say no you haven't. Groupthink is not required, nor is someone else's idea of conformity.
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I didn't like the judgement used about how what and so many other people are doing is being '****'. That part I found incredibly inappropriate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuietMind
Yeah, I'm glad some people don't impose their negative judgments on others and don't go around calling a bunch of other people an outdated Freudian term. Non judgment isn't something everyone values, unfortunately.
Personally, I'm glad my T is flexible and we have our own boundaries, just like others with their T.
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Yes thank you.
And an update, I DID give my T my long letter, he read all of it before the session and said it was fine that I communicate in writing, that I'm brave for saying everything I did, and we had an incredibly useful, fulfilling, insightful, meaningful session because of it.
