Chihiro, I try not to respond to things on the In Session thread, but your T and his arrogance and his lack of empathy and his uncurious, firm opinions about how you operate and why all make me really nervous. Bad therapy can be exceedingly harmful, especially when it sounds like you're in a tough, vulnerable place already. It doesn't seem like he's on your side, and it doesn't seem like he honors the effort you're putting in, and he always seems to assume the worst of your motivations. I'm seeing some giant red flags. Depressed people already beat themselves up enough; they certainly don't need a therapist to help do it too.