Know exactly how you feel. What we realized tho is that whoever is out has to be in charge of the safety etc. of the whole system. That's work! That should be a guy's job too. But everybody calls us by a girl's name. Then we met an insider who would stand by us so we could do girl stuff. He takes over when there is a potential problem. Same when we are doing guy stuff and somebody who knows us as a girl shows up. Clothing is always a problem. So we had to make rules. Always wear pierced earrings, a ring, and when feasible a necklace. That's cuz we don't want people to know about us. It's like a game!