Wow, I am sorry you life is so out of control, and yes, the bipolar "chemistry" are definitely a large part of it. Hugs.

Keep trying to achieve stability, however you can. After my own very serious attempt, I know very rarely drink (in the last 12 months, I have only had one glass of wine). I think when you are bipolar, when you are feeling good, you can get carried away with drinking but then drinking too much eventually pushes you into a deeper depression because alcohol is a depressant. For the sake of your children, would you consider obstaining from alcohol? I know that that would not solve your very serious challenges controlling your mood swings but it would help. I am so glad that I gave it up. Hugs.