The basic question of "why don't men get help" has to do with a couple factors that have already been touched on here.

The first is that yes, we're taught to be strong and stoic at all costs. When a little girl skins her knee, she cries and is comforted. When a boy does the same thing, he's (often) told not to cry and to be a man. This creates a habit that's carried into adulthood. Just look at how hard it is to get many men to see a doctor for a physical problem. They just don't want to go. Not only does it show weakness but letting someone else poke around at you breaches the defenses we work so hard to build. We need those defenses to be a man.

The second is that girls are encouraged to explore and understand emotions while boys are taught to be physical and competitive. Many men lack the tools necessary to really understand or verbalize their own feelings. Instead men feel them and react without much reflection. Again, I stress this point, men are just as emotional, they (often) just don't have the tools to do much more than react to them. On the other hand, women have focused on feelings and communication skills since they were old enough to play house. So when mental health issues come up, women are much more equipped to recognize this and seek help. Men (often) are not only not equipped to recognize the problem but are more likely to avoid even the suggestion of a problem because they're reacting to the anxiety such a suggestion causes. This creates a pattern of avoidance for men that helps lead us to an early grave.

The third thing is that a lot of demands are placed on men these days (both sexes, actually) and we don't deal with anything that isn't urgent. Mental problems rarely seem like an emergency so seeking help can be put off...and put off...and put off...even when we do see that we have a problem.

As to how to get a man to get help? That's too dependent on the individual to answer. For my father, he had to have a stroke before he got help for the anxiety that I inherited from him. I guess you just do your best to talk about it and hope you reach him.

Cyran0