Have you tried family counseling with your mom? I get that she has a lot going on with her health, at the same time it's not fair to you to lay it on so thick. It's tough not to build up resentment to someone when these things get said. I know my own mom would pitch fits at the idea of my wanting to move out of state when I finished college. It was rather childish of her upon reflection. Gosh even when I moved to my own apartment she told me that if I left I was never coming back. I was 23 for crying out loud. I was going to flub up she'd say. Soooo....when I had my first bout of optic neuritus(later dx MS) guess who did that all by themself? The drs the testing etc?

Anyways. I'm beginning to digress about any lingering resentment about my own mom.