View Single Post
 
Old Mar 01, 2008, 04:01 AM
Anonymous33350
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
When i was 13 i didnt know anything about cutting or suicide. It just wasnt anything i had ever heard about. I became friends with this girl named Kayleigh who cut and was always suicidal. I made her my "project" i wanted to help her so bad and we became best friends. She always talked to me about what she went through at home and how she coped (cutting and drinking) I would always try to be supportive and give her these long lectures about why she shouldnt do that and she always called me when she was suicidal and i helped talk her out of it. I never really understood how she could do those things to herself. It didnt make sense to me. Well when i was 14 things got bad in my house, some of same things that she had to deal with and some worse but she and I werent friends much anymore because she got sent away for a bit. I meet this new girl name Kayla and she cut herself because she thought it was funny and liked how it looked on her arm. That really confused me. So here i am 14 and everything is getting worse and worse for me at home and everyone around me is doing this cutting thing. Then we had a guidance presentation about drug abuse and self harm. The teacher said "a lot of teenagers cut themselves once and if they are normal it hurts and they never do it again, but if they are emotionally hurting it works for them" so i thought about that and i was like oh a lot of teenagers to this, then whats the problem? So one day my mom flipped out on me and started telling me all the negative things about me and i lost it. I sat in my room crying with a knife in my hand and i cut my self 3 times on my left arm. The next day i went to school and kayla saw my arm at lunch and said DID YOU CUT?! really loud and i immediatly snapped back no my cat did it and she said yeah right thats what i always tell my mom. I actually didnt stay friends with this girl for long because i was afraid of people finding out but I have done it ever since...
so to answer your question, yes, if i didnt learn that all these kids in my school did it i wouldnt have ever thought to do it.