I know you don't understand and in all honesty I don't really expect you to either- because it's all about the Christmas trees and baubles. I'm low and so very sad. Two more years and I'm done with my degree. I still have time to learn, but I'm just finding the clinical aspect so foreign. None of it feels real. I feel like a person I've just become colder and detached. I don't want to do this anymore.