Be kind to your self then today. Your strength will come back on time.

I've not got much to say but am in a similar place. When I'm strong I can see the benefit the relationship is bringing in the long term, when I'm not I send lengthy emails, ending them in love, not yet used words I love you but I've spoken of a lot of paternal transference, ended loads of emails with love, been very very very needy. So I reckon he knows.

Hope you feel better soon.

Eta to add. These are normally 3am emails so you can imagine the content. You are not alone!!!!