I don't want to need you at all. But I do. You are the only person who understands me. How am I supposed to do all of this? I can't deal with this. I can't even wait until next Wednesday. I really can't see any viable options. I have NO idea what I am going to do. AT this point, the more I have to tolerate this situation/the corresponding feelings such as rage at other people at work, rage at myself, and whatever else. Which is making me feel more alone. And ostracized. And the intense hatred/rage toward admin isn't helping. I keep going through this. I keep going through people not believing me. SO **** all of this. If I am destined to be alone, then I am going to self destruct. There are no options left. I'm nothing but a disappointment.