Everyone, at some point, has done something they aren’t proud of. That is inclusive of the beloved therapists in question.

Typically when clients find their way to therapy, they aren’t in a great place to begin with. Between the dynamics of therapy, therapy being intrinsically stressful, and the fact that we are seeing therapists at their best while we are at our worst, crap happens. We would like for all of this emotional releasing to happen in a neat package, but that’s not how it always works.

Yes, we all have to be responsible for our own behaviors. However, our therapists are also responsible for helping keep feelings contained.... for not being overly reactionary... for giving clients room for outburst and to make mistakes. Unfortunately we may not always be aware of boundaries till they have been crossed, and the consequences can be harsh.

Are therapists responsible for working with clients that cross boundaries? Sometimes. It comes with the territory. For the other times, I get it... nobody should work in abusive conditions... though I do think those that sign up to work in this field need to be strong, patient and resilient. Even if a therapist needs to terminate, I don’t think clients need to relentlessly punish themselves for things like driving by a public street, or yelling, or slamming a door. No therapy should end with that amount of self-flaggelation especially for such minor offenses... not when clients are working so hard to live easier and be better people.