Resurrecting this old thread for no good reason (except I'm re-reading it). I never made those origami flowers, but I did buy my therapist a bouquet of yellow roses in May. He liked them. I wish I had time to bring him more flowers more frequently. Next May, I'm going to bring flowers to his grave.

If my therapist were alive and healthy, I would bring him flowers all the time. And postcards of art, poetry, trinkets, and other little things. He wouldn't accept expensive gifts from me, but he accepted little things. If only I had more time with him...

If I could do things over again, I would have brought him flowers when I first posted this thread. I wouldn't have waited months and months. I would have let him know early on how much he meant to me. But I was so afraid.

Afraid of looking crazy or stupid or ridiculous. Afraid of rejection. I was afraid he'd terminate me if I told him that I loved him. How silly! But that was the process. That was therapy.

If I could do it over again, I would not have doubted him.

If I had more time with him, I would trust him completely.

If only, if only, if only...