I made my mom a cake today
it took a lot of tries and time to get it right
i wanted her to like it
but i made my mom and step dad get in a fight
and now she said her stomach hurts to much to eat any
everything is my fault
i suck at life
and my best friend doesnt seem to undertand what i'm saying
i feel really unimportant
and my friend cassie is in a fight with me for something i dont even understand so im just saying whatever and shes like "i dont have the sisterly love i use to have for you or even a friendship love but i will always have christian love for you and maybe some day we will have the old friendship we use to have back" and shes trying to be this holy mother thresea person and i dont even know why were not friends but im upset and i feel like im lossing everyone and everything.
Also i found out i have to get surgery because i bite my lip and my way to not cut.. i bite it until it bleeds and then i still dont stop and now i have an ulcer. plus the cut on my stomach stings and i feel so stupid.
Running away never seemed like such a good idea as it does now. i have alway thought about it but tonight it feels like it could really work out. like i could really go through with it... get on a train and go somwhere to hide away where they wouldnt know where i was.somewhere were i was wanted and loved...
bad nights suck.

and my stupid S key is not working so if i forgot an s somewhere sorry i have to push it like 10 times to get it to work