Dear T, you cracked me up yesterday as I walked to the door and acknowledged I'd had another topic in mind today. You stopped and so generously gestured back towards the chair and invited me to sit down and talk about it. I said, "I'm not a doorknob person." You said, "Indeed you are not."

I appreciated that you offered me more time, time that I know you would not have charged for and it is likely I was your last person of the day, and would have delayed your time leaving for home.

I had a brief longing to stay, and it was only partly my desire to avoid the subject (love! romance! just the abstract feeling of it) why I said no. But the deeper roots are that I feel well-deposited with self care, that I feel whatever the opposite of generosity towards others is. I mean that just like I enjoy feeling generous with my money and my time (but it requires that I feel I have enough), I liked being generous in my refusal, as I felt the session had given me enough. That was a good feeling. Enough.