I have known my girlfriend (I am a girl too) for over a year now, Ive been in love with her for a year and she’s been in love with me. In the beginning of our relationship, she was still involved with someone she was in love with before me. It took a lot of waiting and patience and forbearance to finally get to the place where I could actually be with my girlfriend for real. I was really hurt by her, a lot of emotional pain and scars from that whole situation. (way too long and complicated to explain)
Once we were finally dating, I held a lot of resentment and bitterness and hurt towards her. She is the love of my life, she makes me eternally happy. I want to be with her. But I let myself get carried away and I cheated on her with a guy a couple of months ago. In a way I felt justified because of all the **** she put me through with her ex girlfriend. I ended everything with that guy and tried my best to refocus myself and make my relationship with my girlfriend work. It was going really well until she looked through my phone while I was sleeping and found a picture of the guy I cheated on her with. She confronted me about it, and I lied to her face. I tried denying it. She knew I was lying so I finally admitted that I had slept with him. She lost herself and slapped me, and then started thrashing at me and hitting me on the head.
I tried to leave her house and she wouldn’t let me leave, she was begging me and pleading with me not to leave, she was crying and saying she was sorry and begging me to let us fix it. Once she fell asleep, I got up and left her house.
I broke up with her the next day. Firmly saying it is never okay to hit someone no matter what.
She kept fighting for me.
I missed her, and I want her, so I agreed to meet with her to talk. The moment I saw her, I fell In love with her all over again.
I want to be with her again. But did she cross the line too far by hitting me? I know I crossed the line as well.
But Its never ok to hit someone.
She’s never been violent or abusive before.
Any suggestions or advice would be nice. I am just really confused.