From your other post about him gaslighting you.....there is a lot more behind this than "just untying shoes"

You do seriously need to learn how to communicate. DBT therapy section on Interpersonal Effectiveness was a great help for me. Maybe you should look into getting into some helpful therapy. The issue doesn't seem to be about you bring controlling but it does sound from your other post that you do have issues with your own self confidence & communication both can be helped by therapy.