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Originally Posted by Nammu
Last night was one of those long nights where I question if my stability has come to an end. Though I took my meds as usual could not sleep.......and not sleeping is always the precursor. Takes more than just one night but it always alarms me. My unstablized self is so bad and I've spent so much time in hospitals, an experience I don't care to repeat especially here, where I've heard terrible things about the psych wards. Ah.......it magnifies in the dark. I finally did get some sleep and dreamed I was 5 and was trained to blow up the school. I refused and there were repercussions for me bucking the system, but in the end it all worked out and they were able to see they didn't need to blow things up to get results.
Still nervous about what tonight will bring. Think the whole ordeal is nervousness over the election. Healthcare is primary as is ability for those on disability to live. Do vote today.
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I hope you sleep well tonight. Not sleeping is always the precursor for me too. I fall into hypomania and then, quite soon, full-blown mania. Last psych hospitalization was horrible.
It's even horrible to be a patient in a regular hospital (such as when I had my ulcer operated on, stupid IV alarm went off every time I moved my arm, nurses took forever to respond to the call button, etc.). Even, for goodness sakes, after having a normal birth and the normal postpartum hospital stay (no C-section, no complications). The first time my husband, baby daughter & I finally fell asleep in the hospital after she was born, we were all woken at 5 AM. They dragged in a huge doctor's scale to weigh me, and it's not like I had issues with water retention beyond the norm for pregnancy. Why they saw fit to wake us all up at that God-awful early hour just to get my weight on a huge doctor's scale, I will never know. Couldn't it have waited until 8 AM at least? Then, of course, my daughter would not go back to sleep for forever
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD
Seroquel, Cymbalta, propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, lamotrigine, hydroxyzine,
There's a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in.
--Leonard Cohen
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