LT, my personal impression is that you are indeed making quite significant progress with this T, just don't like sometimes how he does not validate your attachment-related needs that you are trying to get from him. You have already tried female T and MC who was maybe more "relational", but where did they take you really? If you are interested in working on your anxiety about people/relationships further, to me it seems like this T is good because he brings out those things (maybe a female would not, at least not to the same degree) but does not exacerbates them by reassuring and validating all your feelings and needs. I have the feeling that a T who would do that would just keep you stuck in the same state even if perhaps it would be a bit more comfortable at times. I agree with SorryNorma that getting more of those validations would probably never enough. This is why I often say that the kind of attachments some people develop for their Ts are pretty addiction-like. In that sense, validating a lot would be a bit like a spouse enabling the drugging or drinking of an addict, for example. Encouraging something that clearly has adverse effects and blocks important things in life.

Also, maybe I am wrong but I have a sense that your T might be exaggerating things a bit at times either for the sake of challenging you to go against your internal current or maybe because of his own avoidant tendencies or both. Stuff like he almost never thinks about you once the session is over. I think that's quite impossible, the brain does not work that way unless there is some quite significant damage to it. Perhaps you could ask him if this is true and he exaggerates sometimes on purpose?