Quote:
Originally Posted by eskielover
It takes some time to get through the feelings & process them.
Like I said I had initially hoped my leaving my now Ex would have been a wake up call for him to change. After 11 years away from him this last summer we had some good closure conversations. I found out that while had initially hoped he would realize he needed to change, he was sure I would come back to him because he didn't think I could make it without him. He said after 2 years & I didn't come back he realized I wasn't coming back & he must have been the reason I left.
Everyone has their own thinking about breakups/separations. If communications were good in the first place the breakup probably wouldn't be necessary.
When we put all our eggs in one basket & it crashes we just have a ton of scrambeled eggs to sort through. Better to get out more, have more interests & acquaintances. Friendships grow out of knowing & proving trust in people. It's not just about picking someone you want to be friends with.
I had no friends when I lived with my husband. He definutely wasn't my best friend either....but after leaving him & the environment I was able to open myself up in a way I never had before in all my life. It is possible.
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Once again, thank you! I will get through feeling this way. I need to find things to distract me, get out and do things I used to like to do. I let him change my life, I stopped doing the things I liked just to be available for him in the evenings when he was off from work. I got used to the routine. When my daughter left for college I didn’t feel lonely because he was there for me and now that he is not I’m lonely. Little by little I would get to where I need to be and feel healed. But I guess to get there I need to go through this! Well, tomorrow it will be 3 weeks since the break up, and it is also the weekend and I work, I’ll be busy so I won’t be thinking so much. I do really appreciate everyone’s words. It really makes me feel better!