Totally get this. Of my two days off I spend the first sleeping and dealing with the depression that comes with hating what I am doing. Then I spend the second day worrying and thinking catastrophically about the days to come.

I am in a job, new to me not quite three months ago, in which I have had neither support nor training. What I do I've had to learn by observing my co-workers. My department is small and a tight knit clique I haven't been able to break into. My coworkers are constantly gaslighting me and throwing me under the bus. I have no idea what I have done to get on their bad sides. The people that are supervising and managing me have yet to introduce themselves to me and I have yet to see them on the floor. When I have questions then I have no choice but to turn to the very coworkers who have little time for me.

Last night was just such sort of an example. I was scheduled for a different shift for the first time and had no idea the duties involved. No help from my coworkers. Their responses to my questions were terse, angry, and conflicting. The nature of my job means I just can't stop what I am doing and go find someone like a supervisor. So I trundled along last night as best as I could - and made several mistakes including a really big one. My actions resulted in the building alarm going off. I was admonished in front of other staff and yelled at by a manager.

So I too am dreading returning later today. Where is my support and training?