This is hard. I’m really, really sorry.

I struggled with maternal transference a lot. It seems that therapy opens up needs, then leaves us on our own with the hope we can fill them with outside people. This worked for me in some ways and in others ingrained a lasting feeling of rejection and abandonment.

It’s hurtful now but better your therapist draw the line than lead you on in fantasy. Though it may have been better for you to have had consistency (esp with emailing) rather than changing boundaries and taking something important away from you. In my experience this doesn’t bode well for the therapy.