Yes, and there is just so much stress & uncertainty regarding H's career, not to mention how we are going to handle Christmas & birthday expenses for my daughter next month. I am stressed about that too.

I can't focus lately, but this has always been a bad time of year for me (not to mention all the food associated with holidays and post-holiday diets, EDs just love that stuff). I start doing something, say folding laundry, and then I will think about something I meant to look up on the computer, go do that, go back to the previous thing then think, "Oh, I saw that sign driving home that the city is having the annual hazardous waste disposal soon. I wonder if they will take that old gasoline H wants to get rid of." Back to the computer, to the city public works page, gas is not listed, call the city, oops, called emergency public works dispatch (for extreme issues with sewage and such), transfer, transfer, OK, they will take old gas. Better email that to H, or I will forget. Whatever I was doing before all this is completely forgotten. Ugh, now now I need to re-microwave my coffee AGAIN, it's gone cold, let's weigh myself. ED hates that number. Check self out in mirror. Maybe I should fix my hair. Phone rings, automated message: prescription ready at the pharmacy, go to pharmacy, darn it, I forgot to drink my coffee, maybe I should drive down to Starbucks, no, it's close to lunchtime, the traffic gets bad there around lunch and so on and so forth goes my day. And I am actually better now on the Adderall than I was before, but it's still the pits, and you can see how thinking like this all day long except if I am running and dissociating results in little getting done all day.

Really wish mixed would get out of here.

And if I'm not dealing with racing thoughts, then it's negative thoughts & depression. Not to mention exhaustion. I am always so tired, but I'm completely normal on all the medical labs, even special ones they might do. I have the fibromyalgia and the Reynaud's phenomenon (not sure what causes the Reynaud's I have except it's not the usual suspects but it is bad in cold weather). And while it does get cold here, it definitely is nothing to compared to winter in most of the country, just enough to flare the Reynaud's, so I have to be vigilant about keeping my hands (especially my fingers) and my toes warm since that helps it.