He has been violent before???? On the first date??? IF that's true, then I would dump him and get away as soon as possible. That is going to happen again. Abuse repeats itself.

And if he sold you on a big dream, well, that dream isn't the reality now. He sold you on a fantasy. My ex fiance did the same to me. Best to acknowledge what the real truth is, and leave now or as soon as you can. He's a bum.