Hi nels and MickeyCheeky, thanks very much for your replies - I must admit I still struggle with the relationship at times but I think she's stretched with other commitments.

Is it normal for a person to give themselves something of higher value than to their child? For example a better item of furniture or a better art set or clothing? Sometimes I feel she wants me to struggle but at the same time, I'm not working for health reasons so i guess it's inevitable that I'm worse off and have to accept that. I just don't know what's normal.