I don't have any experience with the US disability system but wanted to lend some moral support. I would also be wondering the same thing if I were in your position. I hope some more people chime in who have experience.

I was a high functioning professional until my breakdown and diagnosis in my mid 40s. I was on a return to work plan for years but my employer pushed me into long term disability and that is where I am now and have been for over 5 years. The longer you have been out of work the more daunting and unlikely is the chance to ever go back too.