I suffer from a short mental capacity. What I mean by that is that whenever I do some mental activities like reading, thinking, and focusing on something that requires mental effort, I get tired very quickly (within minutes), and I lose concentration. Often times I get headaches, and everything goes blank.

But this also happens when I am in large crowds, like parties and airports. I feel so overwhelmed, and as if my brain shuts down and everything starts to look fake, and I lose my ability to realize what's happening. I see people talking and moving, but in my head they are just images and noises. I somehow disassociate from reality. I usually connect the two, but maybe they are different things.

For example, I recently traveled, and I was mentally drained as soon as I stepped into the airport to check-in my bags, and got headache all the way, and wasn't on my full awareness and mental capacity at all. I thought to myself, well this isn't normal. People around me seemed to be mentally sharp, and very connected to the reality.

I've suffered this for as long as I can remember. I think this has created a ripple effect in my life, because I cannot do anything very well, which has eroded my-self esteem, and from there things have just collapsed in my life.