I may have an anxious attachment style. Or be on that spectrum. Not a bad thing, but I've been talking to someone who has been really triggering this attachment in me, who I really like, but who is pretty lukewarm and mellow towards me.

The weird thing is, and please DO NOT JUDGE ME, we only talked for like four days, and I found myself really liking him, and wanting more. I couldn't help it. Like I was like wanting him to text more and give me more attention. It almost felt like I was being breadcrumbed, if anyone knows what that means. When he gives a little, but not a lot. Not enough. I almost wondered if he had avoidant attachment. Or just was not that interested / keeping his options open, etc.

Weirder, I found myself going back on the dating site only to see if he was on there. He was. And that triggered me too. I ended up breaking off communication with him. That was a week ago.

I have been really on and off lonely for the past week. I didn't even connect it to not dating, etc. But that was a change in the last week.

I ended up impulse messaging him last night. I apologized to him. I told him I have been on and off depressed, which I thought was true, but I think the more accurate thing is that he triggered me and we may not be the best dating partners.

He responded, and said "well to be honest, it did get kind of weird pretty quick. But we can chat if you want. I'm not promising anything about where it's going. We can just see how it goes." I was a bit turned off by this. I was happy that he wanted to still chat. But he called me weird. And he didn't express concern or care. And I have heard that men know faster than women about if they really like someone, and he sounds like he's just looking for a texting buddy or something. Or he's definitely in a different place. He also lives 3 hours away from me, so talking to someone so lukewarm doesn't feel worth it to me.

I'm really attracted to him physically, but I think this is the wrong dating situation for me. Especially since I get so triggered by our interactions. Like I was literally sad that he wasn't texting me much. It was weird.

I want to date someone who pursues me and expresses interest and like. And I don't think it's too much to ask for reassurance. Yes, I needed it super early with this guy, but I'm pretty sure it is because he was already triggering me.

I guess I know what is best for me. Writing it out helped though.

I'm open to supportive and helpful comments though. Thx.