today I snapped at someone.

they were talking to me about something that they thought I was looking forward to and I just snapped at them. I think they were quite shocked by it- I'm like no, I didn't enjoy it, I'm not well.. and yes, I'm really still not well- and very suicidal still.

I opened my advent calendar today and had a chocolate soldier behind the door

a chocolate soldier?

what the **** does a ****ing soldier have to do with christmas

all I'm saying on that

now just listening to christmas music and feeling low