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Thanks BirdDancer. My paranoid delusions increased in scope and severity with each subsequent breakdown. Last time, which was last year, I thought I was part of a global conspiracy to take over the world at that leaders of governments and spy agencies were monitoring all my communications, had video in my house and that this was my destiny as a birthright. It was the epitome of megalomanic psychosis.

It didn't help that the police started repeatedly banging on my door sometimes several times a day. The neighbors called them because i was acting odd. I had learned I had the right not to answer them but they kept coming back and I became more and more convinced of my delusions as a result.

In the end I had a dozen police cars outside my house and they broke down my door and took me away to a forensic psychiatric facility for a month where I was charged with all kinds of crimes including evading police by not stopping on the highway when one followed me, without turning on their siren. I was at that point totally paranoid about police which is why I didn't stop and just drove home.

They claimed I had run a red light, which I had not. I had just driven home and locked my door. The next day they came to arrest me.

Otherwise there would have been a photo since the light I supposedly ran has a camera on it. Eventually I was put on probation and the charges were dropped after completing a diversion program for mentally ill individuals.

The facility they had me held men and women together and was truly intimidating. I was mixed in with men who had stabbed police officers... or set fire to buildings or were meth addicts. One or two were just homeless people. It was also an eye opening experience and one that I truly hope will never be repeated. I learned that I do not have the right to not answer the police at my door even when they are shouting my name out loud and acting aggressively while carrying loaded weapons.

That was my reality. Now I take an antipsychotic everyday. Apparently someone in the complaint where I was arrested had looked into my medical files and saw i wasn't taking an AP. It was only when I got out of the facility that I consented to take an antipsychotic and tried rexulti and take it every day.

I don't mean to be derailing this thread. I would be terrified if I started hearing things again and would immediately start on Olanzapine and callmy pdoc. Sorry!