Hi everyone, last night, my DBT therapist sent me a format for a letter that she suggested I write for ex T. I thought I’d share the format here if anyone wants to write one. I know many of us have either lost or are losing our Ts right now, so here it is for anyone who finds it helpful. I might post mine here when I finish it.

FORMAT FOR LETTER OF LOSS

Define the loss:​​​​In losing you, I lost….
​​​​​When I think of you, I remember…
​​​​​What you meant to me…

Positive experience/Appreciation:​What I miss about you is…
​​​​​I appreciate you for…
​​​​​Pleasant times I remember about you are…
​​​​​I respect….

Negative Experiences:​​​I am angry at you for….
​​​​​I felt hurt/shame/disappointment….
​​​​​I felt lonely/fear….
​​​​​I feel guilty…

Closure/Letting Go:​​​I regret I…
​​​​​I forgive you for…
​​​​​I forgive myself for…
​​​​​Hardest thing about letting go is…

Meaning:​​​​Through losing you, I am changed…
​​​​​What I will always cherish about you…
​​​​​What I will do differently in my life…
​​​​​I learned….

Symptoms of Grief and Loss: Denial, Emotional release (crying), Reactive Depression (loneliness, isolation, feeling hopeless), Panic (feeling overwhelmed, confused and fearful), Remorse and regret, Anger, Physical ailments (headaches, colds, nausea and hypertension).
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