if you were a woman scott, i'd give you a hug and tell you everything is going to be alright.... even well... have to think of something different then.....

growing comes to mind..... imo, if im not dead, i can still grow..... ive known of people who had deathbed revelations.. so, growing continues all thru life ....

you measured yourself... not up to me to say accurate or not... honest is what id say about it.. even brave...

you are ready to start...

i still say the wisest words a woman ever gave are that a guy is sexy when he does stuff... there's youre sexy page..

what did Dad tell me? .... seems like work was mandatory, so ive worked...

he said honoring women is important... so, ive tried to honor women......

learning and growing.... maybe im slow, maybe im fast, maybe we study for years and then it all falls into place one day...

self respect matters... one story i remember is about the truckers on the highway... they'll spend $300 to make those truck wheels shine.....

i had a friend, it was his work, buffing truck wheels .... he said they do it because 'they care that much about their profile' ... i swallowed those words whole....

learning continues.... 44, am i a man yet? didnt go to war... was peace time then...... feel an allegience tho to my family and my country....

want my son to be proud of his Dad... like i was proud of my Dad... so i work at htat... i try to improve at my moral behavior because others see... children especially concern me..... things like loyalty and truth and fairness matter to me and i express it more often these days..

i take care of my mom, im a loving brother, im an estranged father... i combine all this into one and accept it.... its me.....

it hasnt always been like this for me...... learning and growing....