I'm so sorry you're struggling, Aimless Soul Please, don't be so harsh on yourself. Lots of people struggle with what you've just mentioned, and it's not necessarely their fault. It surely isn't your fault here, especially if you have to deal with MI on top of all of this. Please, don't give up, you never know how life could turn up in the future... and in any case, your life IS worthy, regardless of everything else.