I tried to return to Catholic Church full-time this year. By that I mean not just going on holidays. So I volunteered at a local church. But then the **** hit the fan...again...this summer...with so many accusations of sexual misconduct...I felt I had to step away.

For me Christmas was always mainly about church. Without church...I don't see the point.

In fact, I was never aware of how commercial Christmas had become until I stopped going to church.

I don't have friends or family. I am alone. Going to church brought me comfort on holidays. But I just cannot go back.

I haven't found anyone who really understands. Everyone hates the Catholic Church and a lot of people hate religions...with good cause. Still...if one grew up with religion...it can be a comfort.

I am just trying to say that without religion, to me, the holidays are just...really dumb...and all the reindeer and snowman and Santa stuff seems...stupid...or worse, just plain creepy.

Christmas music in stores strikes me as pretty creepy, too.