Dear T,
I need to figure out how to make it through these down times that I inevitably go through. H bought a huge item (brand new car) for D who doesn't have a job. I have no choice but to change things, including both how I react, how I communicate, how I handle things, and how to let it go after that. It feels like I don't have a chance. Hence the term I feel nonexistent, or maybe I feel existent but disregarded/disrespected. Right now I feel really sad and emotional. I a dreading going to work the next three weeks. I wanted to just go once to see you, but if it is okay, twice a week is really being helpful at this time. I want so badly to cry, but I can't. I wonder when I will explode. Thank you for your help.