Quote:
Originally Posted by MoxieDoxie
Do therapist know and understand this is all happening? I am very enmeshed to my therapist and I spent the weekend trying to comfort that small child part that was in such despair. I have therapy today at 3pm. I did send him an email last night that I felt it was not the modality that he is using to help me with my issued but it was the relationship and the thought of leaving therapy brings back all the symptoms that brought me to therapy to begin with.
It is not normal to be thinking about your therapist every moment of the day. That is how my weekend went and I need it to stop. How can therapist think that is healthy?
Right now I just feel I can not leave therapy. If I was a healthy functioning adult I would not have gone into therapy to begin with. Since therapy with him I stopped being bulimic, I do not self harm and I do not think about killing myself on a daily basis. When I think about leaving therapy all those feelings seem to flood right back in. So I do not know anymore.
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My therapist had no idea what she was doing to me (and possibly many other clients).
I’m fairly certain she believed I was being histrionic when I complained about side-effects. And also took no responsibility and was careless with her responses.
I truly believe that unless someone has ‘been here’ they aren’t able to appreciate how excruciating, humiliating, hopeless and anxiety provoking an attachment like this can be.
I will say, if there are improvements as a whole (ie discontinuing harmful thoughts and behaviors) it might be worth holding on. That was not the case for me.