Oh, where do I start??? This started with the depression and social isolation. After I fell into then out of an abusive relationship. I got out of it but it was extremely traumatic. I was stalked and all other kinds of terrible stuff. Police involvement. The kind of stuff I never before encountered in life.


I moved out-of-town to a new neighborhood out in a semi-rural area in order to feel "safe." I succeeded in feeling safe but I really hate where I live. It is bleak and boring and I hate my cramped little apartment. But I guess I really got down on myself for having gotten into that mess in the first place. Those regrets just snowballed.

I have a lot of problems. I have been unable to resolve my problems and I feel frustrated - like I cannot depend on myself. I have had a very nonproductive couple of years.

I am a goal oriented person. Without succeeding in accomplishing goals I feel useless.

I think I probably had a very bad case of PTSD. I just ended up hating myself...which I think is pretty common after getting out of an abusive situation. I have become very cautious, isolated, and inward. I am irritable almost all the time. It is difficult to describe. It is like I don't fit into my own skin anymore.


PTSD is difficult to recover from but I hope I will eventually heal.