Dear T, I eff'd up and rescheduled our last appt., knowing full well it was a bad idea. Due to this being your busy time of year, our appt was already 2 weeks out, then the reschedule required me to wait another 3 weeks. I didn't ask to be put on your wait list for an earlier opening and I know I could have, but then why reschedule in the first place, right?
On one hand, I felt I had to. Work got crazy busy and leaving early would have been extra difficult that day or even that week. I needed to take care of work things. Not myself. After all, what's more important?
I am stubborn and I know I'm functioning, but I also know that the depression cycles and I get caught up in it.
I feel like I'm sitting on the side of a well, knowing full well what safety precautions I should take, and then decide I don't need them. Soon after I fall in...head first. Sitting at the bottom, arms crossed, pissed off and frustrated because I can't get out on my own. Dumb ***.
See you Thursday, assuming I don't cancel again...