Trigger warming : Christmas depression



Anyone else not too excited about Christmas and new year?
My mum was diagnosed with leukemia last month again (3rd time)
I've made some progress with my mental health this year but now I'm concerned it may be all wasted
Nothing to look forward to next year, have no idea what to do with my life
Being confused by my spirituality makes Christmas very painful in a deeper, spiritual way. I'm very triggered by hearing Christmas songs everywhere and people faking happiness.

Are there more people who feel similar?