Given how interested you are in exploring things related to your sexuality, this is definitely something to keep in mind and discuss in therapy that addresses the topic. Like others, I am also not sure I would trust the perceptions of a T like yours (based on your posts) but if you choose to work with her... As far as reporting your father (that was suggested here), I am not sure it would be valid based on what you described in the OP, especially assuming that he might behave similarly with children. You are not a child and don't have any memory of his inappropriate behavior in your childhood. I would definitely not allow the behavior and comments you describe though. I understand (from previous posts) that you can have ambivalent urges as well, but allowing something like that would probably just feed them or make you even more confused.