im struggling a bit with this and was hoping to maybe hear some other experiences with this
got a call from my T this morning .when i answered she asked if she had informed me of her office change .i told her she had not and then she asked if i had time to talk. she told me that the person that she sublet the office from wanted it back and she didn't feel comfortable working out of that office had decided to see clients out of her home. she said that she would like to start that with me today she gave me the address of her home and some parking instructions.
so much stuff went through my head . as i was heading there my stomach was in a huge knot .i didnt know what to expect . once i found the house and parking i was just a little less stress. especially when she opened her door as i walked up the steps .i was worried she wouldnt know i was there and i would have to knock or ring the bell . she had the most beautiful house and so clean and immaculate. i felt so funny wearing my shoes on her carpet . she was in her socks . she didnt have an office in her house so we met in her living room.her cat also came in to say hi . i loved that . it is amazing what you can learn about a person from going to there house . im not one for wanting to know much about my T so i was horribly uncomfortable with that.i have done the living with my councilor and t with loose boundaries and it never goes well.i really try very hard to keep from getting to attached to my T do to this . i have high walls .

i was able to express some of this to her . one of the things i am obsessing with is the feeling that i am going to contaminate her home . in an office you can leave all the horribleness in the office and go home . in this situation you cant .i feel im going to contaminate her home with all the horribleness i am . i can see her in the evening relaxing and looking over to the spot on the couch i was sitting on and shuttering at all the horribleness i spewed out that day .and to make it even more horrible is if i was sitting on the couch in her usual seat . how can she get away from it . i couldnt get much into the conversation about that because the moment i started to talk to her about my horribleness she stopped my and started to tell me i was not horrible . but i still feel like im am going to contaminate her home .