I have never done CBT with a therapist and would not, I find it way too simple to pay someone for it. I think a lot of it can be done alone and I used some aspects by myself to help control destructive impulses, mostly when I was freshly sober and had intense cravings for alcohol.

As for groups, I think what you describe is very common. For example on online forums like this, many people get upset and suddenly close their accounts because they were hurt by something someone said to them or about them. Then sometimes they come back because they realize there is more value in it than to lose it because of one person's or a few people's momentary negative comments. Or even just imagining something negative is meant for them or about them. I never felt that way but saw it happen many times.

As far as this group goes, Anne, for me personally you are a member here whose posts I alway look forward to reading and appreciate and often what you have to say, and how you say it, really clicks with me. I like the depth and maturity that usually comes across from your posts and how you tend to discuss things without taking sides just for the sake of it. And you are very articulate.

I don't have children but I think teaching discipline to a kid is very important - that's something my parents did not do (the downside of freedom and having very accepting, non-directive parents) and I really struggled with it as an adult, still do sometimes. I am not generally an impulsive person (if I don't drink) but like to do things in my own terms, which can sometimes lead to disrupted schedules when I have to work with teams and deadlines. It's a funny thing because I am otherwise very strategical and definitely a planner, and generally reliable, but I think I would never be able to work a conventional 9-5 job, for example (never even tried), or would be very miserable in that condition. Teenagers are impulsive by nature, it is a brain development thing, which also means it is a period/age when they are very sensitive to influences, both good and bad. So much better and more effective to learn good discipline at that age than later as an adult.