Thank you so much for sharing, WC. I didn't know what would come tumbling out of me in this thread. I've never told another living soul about my Dad taking those pictures.

It's so sad your brother passed without resolution and being able to fully open up. I'm so happy for you that you have your mother and made a kind of peace with her.

My mother was sending me angry, almost hateful letters up until the day she died. I don't even know where she got the energy to put so much criticism down on paper. I couldn't even read most of the letters they were so negative. I would travel to stay with her in hospital and at home for some periods while she was dying of cancer but it seems that almost everything I did was wrong in her mind.

My mother also finally divorced my father, but then shortly after got diagnosed with cancer. When they were separated already but my Dad still apparently came to the house I brought my boyfriend from uni home with me for a holiday. One day I woke up and my boyfriend was gone. I had no idea where he was. A day or two later I finally reached him on his home phone (it was a 14 hour drive from uni to home).

My Dad had told him that I was a terrible person and he should get away from me. He drove him to the airport and put him on the plane and sent him on his way. When I told my mom what had happened, she didn't have any words to console me. She just said 'your dad did this to get at me'.